When does it become an “accident”?

[FranticK]

The topic below is something I have been thinking about for a very long time and I believe there is no better forum to get people’s opinions, so I would love to hear people’s thoughts!

For many men at their absolute limit, they have increasingly frequent and lengthy moments where they simply can’t stop themselves from uncontrollably urinating into their underwear and pants, but will manage to get those “leaks” back under control and stop urinating. I believe this is especially true in a public setting where the man will do everything in his power to avoid an obvious pants wetting incident.

In these situations, it seems like most people don’t consider a small wet spot to be an “accident” as long as the unfortunate fellow has mostly dry pants and managed to void the rest of his bladder somewhere other than his pants. However, I’ve always been curious about when people believe “leaked” has crossed into “had an accident” territory.

What do people think are the core differentiating factors for an “accident”, as opposed to leaking. For example, leaking that causes a baseball-sized wet spot on the pants followed by the rest of the bladder being emptied in an appropriate place would not be considered an “accident” by many people, though some may disagree. However, a watermelon sized wet spot with streaks running down the leg would likely be considered an “accident” by just about everyone, even if the man did manage to reach a toilet to finish his pee.

I suspect everyone has their own definition, but would love to hear yours and there’s no better site to get people’s opinions on this sort thing!

[ryan1990]

This is an interesting question. Like you I’d agree that most people wouldn’t consider a baseball sized wet spot an accident. However a baseball sized visible wet spot is suggestive of a much bigger wet spot on the guys undies. I think most guys though could laugh off a small leak such as this. I’d agree that a watermelon sized wet spot would be considered an accident even if the guy finished in a toilet.

[googlism2008]

I never really thought about the definition of "accident" until you guys brought it up. I had simply assumed that any leakage, visible or not, is an accident. But don't take my word for it - I am a quarter to halfway around the world from most of you.

Since it appears that size is the main attribute defining whether a wet spot is an "accident", what about the following scenarios:
1. What about a small wet spot at the crotch accompanied by a long and narrow wet streak down one of the pants legs?
2. What if someone peed the entire contents of his bladder through the crotch of his pants and managed to have only a baseball sized wet spot? This is possible with, for example, compression bottoms.
3. Is a deliberate wetting considered an "accident", despite the dictionary stating that an accident is unexpected and unintentional (Oxford)?

[Wombat48]

Yeah interesting question- I am very lucky in that I done really well ever leak, regardless of how desperate i get, however once I did leak, in public, really badly, and more than once- for me, that definitely felt like an accident!!

[Brian]

Yep, great question.

I'd go for the following. It's an accident if it requires taking drastic action over it. So if you've wet yourself so badly that you've got to go home immediately, it's an accident.

If you feel you can get away with continuing to do what you were doing and ignoring it, it isn't.

Under that definition, it's not just how much pee you've let loose, but also what you're wearing, who you're with and what you're doing that will decide if you've "had an accident" or not.

[Sam70]

Yep, great question.

I'd go for the following. It's an accident if it requires taking drastic action over it. So if you've wet yourself so badly that you've got to go home immediately, it's an accident.

If you feel you can get away with continuing to do what you were doing and ignoring it, it isn't.

Under that definition, it's not just how much pee you've let loose, but also what you're wearing, who you're with and what you're doing that will decide if you've "had an accident" or not.

I agree that this is how it is in the real world. Technically, if a small leak should happen as a result in loss of control of the bladder, it is an accident, regardless how much is lost and the situation at hand.

Consider these situations:

1. Bob had an accident during the university three hour final exam.

I am assuming that Bob wet his pants badly and more than Bob know about it.

2. John had an accident on the subway or tube train.

I am assuming that John wet his pants badly while he was riding the subway or tube train.

3. Person One: Do you see that tiny spot on Bill's crotch?

Person Two: Yeah, I wonder if he dribbled a bit before he pulled it out or did he dribble a bit after he pulled it out?

Person One: Probably before he pulled it out. Bill must have been desperate. I am glad he didn't have an accident.

Person Two: Me to!

The above examples explain how people view the term accident in relation to loss of bladder control.

There is a problem with the word accident:

If Jeff is copying something using a pencil and write the wrong letter, that is an accident as he will need to erase and rewrite.

I doubt anyone would say that Jeff had an accident in the three hour university final exam.

If Sue's car collides with another vehicle, that is an accident.

If the boss announced that Sue has had an accident and will be late for work.

Most people would assume Sue had some kind of car wreck, especially if everyone knows she drives to work.

The word accident is a loaded term. We bring previous situations where the word accident might be a term used to describe something that happened.

Excellent question.

[Connor]

Great question. I would say a small leak or dribble wouldn't count. An accident in my opinion would have to be a fairly significant emptying of the bladder. And it would have to be completely involuntary, so really where the guy wets because no matter what they do, they physically cannot contain it anymore.

[jzag1981]

There are many ways to look at this question. I’d agree that technically, any involuntary release of pee in your pants when you are trying to hold it is an accident. In practice, I’d consider it an accident if you’re wet enough to need to change your undies or pants after (whether changing is an option or not is a different story).

[FranticK]

Wow, great thoughts everyone I’m happy I asked the question!

@googlism: for the scenarios you described, I would personally describe number 1 as an “accident”, a wet spot plus a long streak implies lots of peeing happened in the pants and that’s not something you can hide. For scenario 2, I’d also describe that as an accident although it’s probably the least embarrassing way to have one. And I would personally not describe 3 as one.

@wombat: I think we need to hear more about that incident so we can judge for ourselves

@Brian: that framework is a great way to think about it and I am prone to agree! What’s interesting is that that would also imply that the situation can be one of the bigger determinants of whether a man had an accident. For example, even if the same amount of urine is uncontrollably released, having that happen in a dark club in dark clothes might not be considered an accident. While having that happen in the middle of the day in a crowded place in light pants would be. But the idea of having to take drastic measures is definitely a smart way to think about it. Even if it is not easily noticeable, if a man releases a substantial amount of urine in his pants, he’ll want to take drastic action and get home immediately.

@Sam: great description of the 3 scenarios with pants peeing with one not being considered an accident. I guess my question for the third scenario would be: how wet would “Bill” need to be for that conversation to be more along the lines of “oh my god, did you see that Bill had an accident?!?”

@connor: I strongly agree about it needing to be involuntary.

@jzag: it seems like you have a similar opinion to Brian and I agree with you as well. Although in that scenario, I think the frequency of “accidents” happening across the world is higher than I would have originally guessed based on how most men would want to change if it was even somewhat possible people would notice their pee-pee spot, no matter how big or small.

[Sam70]

The term involuntary has been used. It is very important.

Pilots of fighter jets are crammed in. There is absolutely no way to move around and piss in a bottle or urinal. Some of those routes are about 7 hours.

Fighter jet pilots have two choices. If they are showers, they can put on essential a sock diaper. Growers as well as the female fighter pilots have to wear protection, a word that means diaper. It is my understanding that fighter jet pilots have to pass the "piss in the diaper" test before they can fly a fighter jet.

All pilots are given some privacy to remove the diaper and dispose of it. All pilots whether they used the diaper or not must shower.

This is so it isn't obvious which pilots pissed themselves while flying and those pilots who didn't.

Even if a pilot pisses 16 oz of pee into his diaper on a route, it is not an accident. The diaper is the regulation toilet for fighter jet pilots when piloting a fighter jet. I remember reading somewhere that these pilots are not suppose to try to hold it. The air force does not want any of their pilots in any kind of desperation. They want all the pilots' attention to be focused on piloting that fighter jet.

Just let it flow when the urge hits!

I wonder how many people in the public eye wear a diaper just in case? Think of how many public figures are past 80?